Small Talk: Embrace it

Introduction:

There have been many instances where you were at the store, library, school, park, or even walking, where a person strolls past you and asks a question about your outfit, or as basic as the time of day. Especially in today's society, many people tend to freeze and try to minimize conversation as much as possible. However, small talk is the essence and fundamental exercise to build proper English, confidence, and even charisma. Mastering communication to a certain extent can be applied to various instances and enhance your likability.

What is Small Talk?

Small talk refers to a conversation where basic phrases are exchanged, and the communication between two people lasts for a short period of time, or if the conversation has a specific task to fulfill. One example includes asking where a certain food item is at a grocery Store. It meets standards, both individuals participate, and it is often left unnoticed. Simple gestures like these build speaking skills; however, they can feel awkward and pressurizing at times. Talking to someone you’ve never seen or trying to make a new friend using cliché phrases can make it hard for individuals to express themselves thoroughly. Though almost all friendships, networks, businesses, and clubs are built through small talk, and how well each member understands the others. 

Why does it matter?

As stated previously, small talk is a fundamental skill for building networks. How exactly? It allows the speaker and the listener to engage in a more emotionally charged conversation than usual. For example, when someone new asks a question, it’s more likely for the respondent to listen and give clear instructions because they want to portray themselves as respectful as possible. People start to get good impressions when they’re met with sufficient responses, and may even want to talk to you in the future. Complementing someone’s shoes can build likeability and charisma, as people want to be around others who understand and appreciate them.

How does it relate to learning English?

Learning English is more than memorizing vocabulary terms; you actually have to apply it through connecting in real conversations. Small talk is the perfect opportunity because it's composed of basic phrases and responses that can be applied to several scenarios. The next time you visit a store, try asking an employee where a specific item you’re looking for is located. Try complementing someone’s clothing or ask for tips about how they dress. The variation in environments allows the speaker to develop conversation skills and build confidence. Confidence is built through consistent practice and the improvement of already existing skills. A confident speaker would want to talk more regularly, thus improving their English, because they are pushing themselves to strengthen their skills.

How to continue a Conversation:

Once the first few sentences are finished, then what? Most people end up in a dilemma as the other person is staring at your conversation, which you initiated. Embarrassment and a lack of words are common because conversations are not one-dimensional. You must expect conversations to take turns, switch subjects, or for the other person to ignore you. To master small talk, you need to accept all conditions. Here is a scenario

• “Hey, I like your shoes, where did you get them from?”

• “Thanks, I got them from the shoe store near the bakery over there?”

• “Oh nice…”

People tend to freeze. Small talk can sometimes be lengthy and enduring. However, forcing yourself outside of your comfort zone and intently listening and responding will ultimately build your English skills in the long run. Listen and understand the topic of the present conversation; do not focus on your own words, but rather focus on the other person. Ask the brand if they have a recommendation for shoes, and ask if they've ever been to the bakery near the store. There are numerous ways to expand a conversation, but it depends on whether the speaker truly cares about learning. 

The other scenario is also true. At times, you will encounter individuals who do not want to speak or feel uncomfortable extending a conversation past a certain period of time. You’ll have to respect their boundaries and move on. It’ll be embarrassing to accept it, and you may lose motivation to continue, but pushing yourself outside your comfort zone will build confidence over time. 

Conclusion:

Small talk is a quintessential skill for all English speakers and language learners in general. All intricate and detailed conversations stem from small talk. Your friendships that you had for ten years were built through small talk. As embarrassing as it may be, it is the foundation for improving speaking skills, creativity, and confidence. Believe it or not, visualizing conversations in your head and being curious about other people's goals, preferences, and food choices can improve your chance of finding opportunities. Hope through English hopes to maximize confidence and speaking skills for all English learners. Even existing learners, confidence is extremely important as it drives motivation and the desire to be the best English speaker.